The Committee to Clean up the Woods

Mole hurried along the path back to the wooden gate and his job as the gatekeeper near the south end of the woods. Owl, the woodland mayor, had asked him to pick up some poultice from Squirrel for his aching bones and joints – he’d been in terrible pain recently, the result of age and wounds received in The Great War. Continue reading →

Posted in Short Stories | 1 Comment

The Little Big Top

She held tightly to his large hand, and together they struggled against the strong winds and slashing rain. With her other hand she cradled a tiny cricket cage against her slight body. Her tattered cloak barely covered her, and she tried to keep it pulled around the fragile cage. The huge man Continue reading →

Posted in Short Stories | Leave a comment

Thank you for your service…

This is a photograph of my father-in-law, Jack Knapp, Barbara’s dad. He was the navigator on a B-17 flying out of North Africa on reconnaissance flights I think over Italy – Once photographs were developed squadrons of B-17s took off from fields in Northern Africa and bombed those sites into oblivion.

It was on one return flight that a naval vessel on the Mediterranean below radioed the aircraft to identify itself, a standard operation in those waters. There was no response, and the challenge was issued again. Still no response. Apparently the radio on the Continue reading →

Posted in Photo Gallery | Leave a comment

Anthology of the World’s 1,010 Worst Puns ~ Vol. XI

(Following is the Introduction to the projected Volume XI in the series I originally began as a project with my grandchildren. It began with a question from my eldest grandson, Casey, who wanted to hear “the world’s worst joke.” That launched a joint project between me and my four grandchildren, Casey, Venice, Xander, and Teiya, to produce and self-publish a series of books of puns. Each contained 101 of the “World’s Worst Puns” and the grandchildren drew illustrations for a handful in each volume. We self-published 8 such volumes through CreateSpace, an Amazon subsidiary, and these are available on Amazon.com. When I signed a contract with Ulysses Press out of Berkeley, CA to pen the block of puns for “The Ultimate Book of Dad Jokes” published in 2017 I agreed to forego self-publishing volumes IX and X. The puns for the Book of Dad Jokes book were those of the 8 volumes plus the texts for the next two projected volumes for a total of 1,001 puns. Volume XI was to be an anthology of all eight of the original self-published volumes plus the two unpublished booklets. This was the anticipated Introduction to Volume XI.)

The world is made up of two kinds of people: those who appreciate puns for their sophistication and the sublime subtly with which they unfold in blatant disregard for the rules of language, and those conservative of mind who eschew coloring outside the lines and typically show their disdain for puns by the rolling of the eyes. The latter do absolutely love to hate puns and make it a supreme art to agonize over them. Those of you courageous of mind and spirit who openly profess a love of puns are cautioned not to gloat as this would be supremely unseemly and unkind to those lesser endowed.

This anthology pulling together in one volume the eight books of puns in print by this author is the result of a recommendation of my granddaughter, Venice, who thought it was a good idea to have a “giant book” of the world’s worst puns. She and my three other grandchildren, Casey, Xander, and Teiya, make up the talented crew of illustrators who adorned the pages of those nine volumes with their artful illustrations. At their own request they have submitted additional illustrations to add to the richness they created for the original volumes.

The writing of these 1,010 puns was a personal treat because it involved working with my grandchildren in a joint project. It was a challenge to think up this many puns but once the project started they came readily to a demented and skewed mind. The project moved forward because the grandchildren enjoyed reading the puns and actually laughed at them, and relished the challenge of creating images for those puns that somehow tickled their fancies. As a grandfather I couldn’t have asked for a better project to share with my grandchildren.

 

Gordon H. Nagai ~ Eugene, OR ~ Late Winter 2015 (original date)

Posted in Intro to My Writings | Leave a comment

WHAT’S WITH ALL THIS STUFF WITH PUNS? July 10, 2018

I was recently asked during a Creative Writing class I’m taking how is it that I come up with these puns. Do I start out with a theme and go from there, or is there some other thing that happens? How does it work for me?

I have always been fascinated with words and their power since I was a child, and being an introvert have spent major segments of my life on an inward journey to lands of magic and intrigue. My mind is a fertile setting for words to tumble around and plant themselves and germinate into whatever comes of them. Continue reading →

Posted in Intro to My Writings | 1 Comment

The Dirty Baker’s Dozen

The weather had been mild and sunny over much of the spring and early summer, and prosperity had returned to the Villages nestled between the rolling plains and low lying hills of the Western Regions. The early spring rains gave rise to lush blankets of green over the hillsides, and along the creeks and rivers that moved gently through the area. But forecasts of storm clouds gathering to the east portending a harsh fall and winter caused not just a little consternation amongst the happy Villagers of Washing Town. Continue reading →

Posted in Short Stories | Leave a comment

A Crystal Bowl In The Sand

Thuleman ob Mephisté, known as Thuleman the Terrible, sat with his back to the tent doorway. It was his incredible arrogance that enabled him to do this. His Chief at Arms, Jhampur ïbn Marnük, was frantic with rage, and paced back and forth in a state of apoplexy. His eyes flashed as he spoke, his shrill voice rising and falling as he admonished his beloved leader. Continue reading →

Posted in Short Stories | 2 Comments

The Window on Midnight

B-17 Recon mission.

The old wooden planks burned under her feet as she flew down the length of the rickety old pier, the sun blazing down, her ponytail trailing straight out behind her in the heavy sultry air. Her one thought was to catch air in the leap from the end of the pier, throwing herself hell-bent into space, fighting gravity even though for only the briefest of moments – it all led up to this point. Her right foot slammed hard onto the third plank from the end, sending a jolt up her lithe body. The uncoiling of her leg muscle thrust her body up to the sky – she aimed high, for the sun, as she threw her arms above her head, her legs continuing to run on the air, digging for advantage – she was airborne. Continue reading →

Posted in Short Stories | Leave a comment

Lightning Strike #2

After my remarkable experience being “discovered” on the inter-net in a search by a couple in Washington, D.C. for a wedding photographer I am a believer. Anything can happen.

However, I would not have thought lightning would strike the same place and in the same way twice. So it was with surprise that in late 2015 I received an email from a woman who introduced herself as an “acquisitions editor” for a small publishing house in Berkeley, California. She explained she was working on an idea for a book of puns to be published just before Father’s Day of 2016 and had been searching the inter-net for authors of puns. She had come across my name and some books of puns listed on the Amazon.com website and wondered if I would be interested in discussing working with her on her project. Lightning strike #2…! Continue reading →

Posted in Intro to My Writings | Leave a comment

Lightning Strike #1

The inter-net is a vast arena where all manner of things happen. Much of this is surely of someone’s conscious intent. Amazing things take place, though more of it is also pretty mundane and of little consequence in the greater scheme of things. It doesn’t matter because things happen. This is one such happening that bends the mind.

In February 2002 I received an email from a couple indicating they had discovered my website in a search for content for their wedding ceremony, and were touched by my photography and written sentiments throughout the site. They wondered if I would consider covering their wedding in Washington, D.C. in January a year hence. Continue reading →

Posted in Intro to My Writings | 2 Comments