The World’s 101 Worst Ant Puns: A Sampler

  1. Back in the ‘60s hippie ants were called Antacids.
  2. Ants who take the law into their own hands are thought of as vigilantes.
  3. Ant teachers are very often pedantic. Not all, but some just are.
  4. Ants with a tendency toward getting into trouble are headed for lives as deviants.
  5. There is an ant child’s game played on four squares and a rubber ball called “Quadrant.” (I know, it’s called Four-Square, but work with me here.)
  6. You can’t just assume that a disheveled, seemingly unemployed and apparently homeless ant is a vagrant. He may just be eccentric.
  7. You could say the ant wasn’t levelheaded because of his political slant.
  8. He had a terrible abusive childhood and it was no surprise the ant grew up to be a miscreant.
  9. The ant manager of the business had such an abusive personality with a total disregard for his employees they felt he was a tyrant.
  10. You knew the ant was from Georgia because he had a southern accent and said he was from Atlanta.
  11. The ant philosopher you have a hard time recalling was named Immanuel Kant.
  12. The old geezer ant never got along with anyone because he was so cantankerous.
  13. Question: What did male ants wear during the early 1700s? Answer: Pantaloons.
  14. When an immature young ant loses his temper we say he had a tantrum and needs a time out.
  15. The Right Reverend Father Ant was the primary celebrant during the high holy week ceremonies.
  16. Question: What is the cook ant’s favorite room in the house? Answer: The pantry.
  17. When Phoebe Ant primped and dressed up in a formal gown she was quite the elegant one.
  18. Everyone liked the TV weather ant and affectionately nicknamed him “Precipitant.”
  19. It’s usual just after an ant is born to refer to her as an infant.
  20. When you speak of “ant boots on the ground” you’re talking about the infantry.
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About journeysofabentmind

Gordon is a Nisei, a second generation American of Japanese descent born in 1938 whose family owned a farm outside of Atwater, California in the San Joaquin Valley. His world was abruptly changed when on December 7, 1941 Japan’s Imperial Navy launched an early morning attack on Pearl Harbor. Thus began a chain of events that resulted in his family’s forced evacuation and internment in a “relocation center” in Colorado during the war. After the war Gordon spent his teenage years in school and working on the family farm. He attended U.C. Berkeley and graduated in 1960 and went on to the Graduate School of Social Welfare at Berkeley earning a Masters in Social Welfare in 1963. He worked in a number of social service settings and last worked as a case manager for developmentally challenged clients in San Mateo, San Francisco, and Marin Counties until he retired in 2000. When his wife Barbara retired in 2007 they moved to Eugene, Oregon following their children and grandchildren. Gordon lives with his wife of 55 years and close to the four grandchildren and life is just good.
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